The Hartford comedy scene has expanded rapidly, with regular standup shows at The Elbow Room, The Spigot and even The Bushnell providing opportunities to new and amateur comics alike. SeaTea Comedy also hosts workshops to focus its stand-ups’ writing and give them experience.

Rob Santos, a veteran of NYC’s most iconic stages, including Caroline’s, New York Comedy Club, and The Comic Strip and The Hartford Funny Bone, appreciates the Nutmeg State’s unique scene. “Connecticut has talent. Connecticut has voices. Connecticut has people who are funny, smart, raw, and original.”

Still, he laments: “It can feel like we are fighting to be seen in a place that does not always know how to support what it has.”

Something else lamentable: the amount of hateful “humor” I’ve seen on stages here.

A recent show at The Elbow Room in West Hartford included misogyny, racism, classism, body shaming, and transphobia. This wasn’t surprising. Comedy has long had a lazy side, most often from cisgendered straight men who really should know better still rely on putdowns in their standup.

Yes, comedy can be a vehicle to address social issues, even move the needle, but only when done with intelligence and care, like in local comic Ellen Last’s sets about parental annoyances: she shits on the behavior rather than the people themselves.

This brings us to the number one rule of comedy from Kate Dresty, a SeaTea teacher who’s performed around the country: “Don’t be a dick. Don’t waste people’s time.”

Rules to live by off the stage, too.